Hi. It’s been a minny, huh? To be honest, I took a break from this because:
I didn’t feel like a newsletter about stuff I like should be taking up real estate in anybody’s brain at a time when a laundry list of atrocities against human beings were (and still are) being committed in real time, right in front of our faces.
I got laid off and needed to get my bearings lol
I still feel weird about it, but am choosing to come back because this is something I care about, not because I think anything has gotten better. Thanks for still being here 💖. And if you haven’t subscribed, maybe consider joining me in my strange little corner:
I have a lot I’d like to do with this lil newsletter, the first being occasionally featuring my favorite go-to recipes. Then maybe city guides? TV thoughts? Idk. I thought about doing a gift guide, but this whole newsletter is kind of…that. For now, we’re right back where we left off. 🎶 These are a few of my favorite things 🎶:
#1: The Dutchess (Dutch Oven) by Great Jones
Don’t ever call her “just a dutch oven.” In the words of Latrell Spencer, “that’s wifey right there.” I’ve had my Great Jones Dutchess for three years, and she’s never failed me. Through countless soups, pork butts, stews, sourdough loaves, gelatinous bone broths, whole chickens, and even my brown butter Rice Krispie treat addiction, she’s shown unwavering loyalty. This girl loves to work! Couldn’t be me (especially rn lmao), but go off babe!!
Pros:
Enameled cast-iron
Oven AND dishwasher safe
A workhorse
Cons:
Too many cute colors to choose from (I have green)
Your friend who is a Le Creuset snob will be c*nty about it
For some reason, you will start believing that you need another one
I should say that I also have the smaller version of this (the Dutch Baby) and love it as well, but for some reason it doesn’t elicit as much joy from me, though I would certainly recommend it.
#2: The Golden Bachelor
I started watching The Bachelor in the fall of 2016 having no prior experience with the franchise. At the time, I had just entered the workforce after graduating from college. Seemingly overnight, I went from wearing bras as shirts whenever I wanted and being regularly blitzed out of my mind with my friends to spending my days at a deeply corporate advertising agency working with bank and government clients (making approximately zero dollars). A shock to the system! I was violently anxious and depressed– finding myself with nothing to look forward to after 10-12 hour days of working on those ads where people talk about the horrors they live with because of all the cigarettes they smoked 😇 (shoutout to the Tips campaign though, fr).
Until I started watching The Bachelor. It was gorgeously vacuous. My brain would melt into a puddle of goo when I turned it on. It was just what the doctor ordered (that, and a truckload of Ativan). I kept up with it for years, Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise included, and only fell off within the last season or so. It got so weird and, if you can imagine, even more formulaic than before. They seem committed to casting the least interesting people to ever be born, especially when it comes to leads.
Enter: Gerry (not pronounced like Jerry. Like Gary, except the second letter is an e), The 72 year old widower looking for love again on the newest Bachelor franchise baby, The Golden Bachelor. I was never not going to watch this. And I’m so pleased to say that it’s just as kooky and sweet as I’d hoped.
Gerry does not know he is extremely hot, which really adds to my overall enjoyment. He seems truly shocked that these women are throwing themselves at him. Gerry often cries about his wife, whom he lost six years ago, and every time he does I cry too! He so genuinely wants to find someone, to do the right thing, to be honest and vulnerable and kind– that it almost makes it hard for me to enjoy when these women act absolutely crazy. I will not say more, but please…watch this. I don’t care how vehemently you’ve denounced the Bachelor franchise in the past. This is worth it, and I know you freaks have Hulu so you can watch Jeremy Allen White wiggle a little skillet around.
#3: Soom Dark Chocolate Tahini
This is so good, it’s really messed up. I used to think that the best use for it was slathering it on toast or drizzling it over waffles, but when I tell you that all you need to forget every problem you’ve ever had in your life is to take one large scoop of vanilla ice cream, smother it in this shit, and add a fat pinch of flaky salt and…
You can buy it on Am*z*n and get 15% off with the code TAHINISF.
#4: K18 Leave-In Molecular Repair Hair Mask & Shampoos
Since the age of 13 I’ve lived with the sinking feeling that I was absent on whatever day in Girl School they taught us how to do hair. The first time I tried to curl my hair it was 90 minutes before my college graduation and I somehow ended up with melted pieces of plastic clinging to a good third of my strands. I literally don’t know what happened or where the plastic even came from. A few months ago at Alaina’s wedding, Ashley walked in on me before the ceremony trying to curl my hair with a straightener. The look of pity she gave me…I’ll never forget it. She tried valiantly to help but I was a lost cause. My whole life it’s just been….shampoo, condition, and maybe a little moroccan oil if I was feeling fancy. I only blow it dry if I’m going to a capital E Event (rare card). My hair often presents as a weird combination of limp and poofy, and I find Mia Thermopolis’ before picture tr*ggering.
About a year ago when I was getting my hair cut (at the best f*cking place in the world, Spoke & Weal), I finally decided to ask what the actual fuck they did to my hair to make it look so good, and why when I try to do it myself at home, I look like a rat that’s been turned inside out. Alessandra kindly told me that it was most definitely the K18 shampoo + hair mask. She also, again very kindly, told me to stop conditioning (gasp) and sent me on my way with the products tucked into my fanny pack.
The thing about K18 is that it’s actually a biotech company. They did all this research (10+ years of it, for this specific product) to find something about a peptide blah blah blah, DNA of the hair, idk, I’m not a woman in STEM. All I know is that it works. I use the shampoo (both are great), which leaves literally no residue and keeps my scalp feeling super clean in between washes, but the leave in mask is the true star of the show. Every time I use it I am awed by science. I am no longer Mia Thermopolis’ before picture, I am Mia Thermopolis landing softly in idyllic Genovia with Fat Louie at her side, hair luscious and healthy (lest we forget, she is rich now, though I sadly am not, Venmo @capri-pearl). If you are like me and were also out sick that day in Girl School, this shit will save you. Also, stop conditioning. Alessandra was right.
#5: Making My Own Bone Broth
I drink a LOT of broth. I love soup, I’m a soup girl. But I love sipping on bone broth more. It’s a bevvie with LEVELS. Salty and savory and unexpected and…expensive, if your clown ass is buying it. And not to use the term “nutrient dense” (annoying) but it’s that, too. Making your own is so easy and so cheap. I know many of you claim you’re as useful in the kitchen as a Miss C. Bradshaw, but I’m telling you, even she could do this.
If you still have your turkey carcass, neck, and/or other stray organs and bones from Thanksgiving, DO NOT THROW THEM AWAY. Put them in the freezer right now, and wait a few days until the step-by-step guide to making your own bone broth newsletter comes out.
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That’s all for today, see ya real soon! 💘
Love,
Cap
Love this! Perfectly captures my feelings about writing at the moment ... everyone’s coming out with a gift guide and I wish I could just write about food in a silly way or my fave kitchen items but it’s hard when the world is a shitshow. This was a welcome reprieve tho Capri :)
I need to hear more about the no conditioner thing please because I've been on that train for YEARS but every time I tell a stylist they act like I committed a crime